now, 2 weeks ago, i borrowed from the library this book titled "yes or no" writted by DR. Spencer Johnson, the same author who wrote the book "who moved my cheese?" i really dont know wad to say about his book. imagine hitting a nail on the head, EVERY page. ouch.

ok this book is about a story of this young man taking a hike, and finding out what exactly made people make bad decisions. the whole book is so meaningful, i swear almost every page had something i could quote from.. anyway, here are some really interesting ones i feel...


Chapter 1: a reliable system.
The guide said, "If you stop a poor decision and create a void, you can fill it with something better."
The young man said, "But i'm afraid that if I give up what I have, I won't find anything better."
"We are all afraid of that," the guide said. "It takes courage to let go of what is familiar and comfortable. But in reality, it is actually a safer and more reliable way to get better results."
"The ancient Chinese had an expression for this wisdom. 'If you want a hot cup of tea, you must first empty your cup.'"



I avoid indecision and half-decisions based on half-truths.
I use both parts of a reliable system to consistently make better decisions:
a cool head and a warm heart.
I USE MY HEAD by asking a practical question
and
I CONSULT MY HEART by asking myself a private question.
Then after I listen to myself and others, I make a better decision and act on it.


Meeting the Real Need: A Summary
Pursuing only the real need in the very beginning gets me better results in the end.
This means both SEEING a vision of needed results in such real detail that I sense myself already achieving them, & then DOING only what meets the real need.
Wants are wishes. Needs are necessities.
Needs are essential for success and fulfillment.
To see what I merely want, I ask, "What do I want to do now?"
To see what I really needed, I ask "What would I like to have done?"
What do I really need from this decision? For me and for others to feel successful & fulfilled?
Is my vision clearly focused on the needed results?
Am I saying "Yes" to only what meets the real need, and "No" to everything else?
Am I meeting the real need?
I use my head by asking myself a practical question:
Am I meeting the real need, informing myself of options, and thinking it through?

Chapter 2: Informed Options
"Fear fogs our vision"

a short story:
"last year, one of the hikers told me that his work suffered greatly after his divorce.He thought he was still in love with his ex-wife, but she was no longer interested in him. He didn't know what to do. He could not eat. He could not sleep."
"was he in love with her?"
"i don't know. But from the way he said he treated her, he did not sound very loving. Nonetheless, he believed that his only chance of being happy and productive again was to be reunited with her. Since that was not possible, he became depressed. Then something interesting happened. He became aware of his options."
"How did this happen?"
"He said a close friend asked him questions that helped him paint mental pictures of his real options. He was asked, 'when you were married, were you and your wife happy?' the man answered, 'no.' do you think you and your wife have changed that much? he answered 'no.' then he was asked 'what leads you to believe you would really be happy with her if you were together now?' would it not be better to improve your attitude and then meet a woman who is more compatible with you?'



ok i'll continue the rest some other time, it's a lot of typing! ahhaha, anyway, i'm so excited at the prospect that i'll be removing my braces soon, cuz i told dr chua about the france trip and she said by hook or by crook will get it removed before i leave, which also means i'll have to be going down to the dentist once every fortnight.. hahaha finally, i wont have to change toothbrush so often!! =D